


Off a Short Pier

by you_guys_are_losers



Series: Spideychelle Week 2k19 [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: F/M, Headcanon, Hogwarts AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-06-26
Packaged: 2020-05-16 03:26:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19309666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/you_guys_are_losers/pseuds/you_guys_are_losers
Summary: Michelle Jones spends her days after class beneath the beech tree on the grounds, and she has since her first year at Hogwarts. So, when Peter Parker and Ned Leeds begin to join her when they are Sixth Years, MJ is naturally protective... And a few of her quips land her in a load of trouble.





	Off a Short Pier

  * There is one thing that MJ would like to make perfectly, perfectly clear
  * The beech tree on the grounds is her spot, and it has been as long as anyone can remember
  * Ever since the first year, the place to find MJ in her free time is sprawled out beneath the Therefore, the sight of MJ, dressed in her green and silver house robes and stretched out in the grass, has become as common a sight over the years as the hourglasses in the Great Hall, the ghosts drifting about the castle, and Peeves lurking in the dark corners to cause trouble
  * For the first five years of her education, this staple of MJ’s life remains unthreatened
  * She has to put up with people and robes during the day, sure, but as soon as the classes are let out she can summon her clothing, dart down to the lake, and enjoy her alone time, rain or shine
  * Sixth Year, though, everything MJ knows is threatened
  * It’s Sixth Year that proves to be the most difficult of MJ’s education, and therefore it’s Sixth Year that she has to put up with the most stress
  * Between the all-nighters, the group projects, and the mountains of homework, it is this year that she needs the tree more than ever, if only to look forward to the sprawling naps in the grass
  * But it is this year that the first real threat to her territory is posed
  * Because it is this year that Ned Leeds and Peter Parker make a move on her turf
  * At first, she thinks it’s just going to be a one-time thing
  * The Ravenclaw and Gryffindor, respectively, sort of show up one day a few minutes after she has settled
  * They don’t infringe upon her space, not exactly, but they do both have the audacity to greet her with polite smiles, forcing her to send a cordial nod their way
  * And then they do the unthinkable
  * They sit down on the other side of the tree
  * At first, MJ has no idea how to react
  * For one thing, she isn’t exactly sure how she feels about them, specifically Parker
  * He and Leeds have competed with her for top of class for ages, but there’s something about him that just makes her notice what he does
  * He’s sweet, and dedicated, and he’s impossibly determined, which has always made him a threat
  * More than that, though, he has deep, dark eyes that speak to a soulful nature and curly hair, which makes him exactly her type
  * For another thing-- Well
  * See first thing
  * She could ask them to leave, but then that would make her seem unreasonable
  * And there’s nothing unreasonable about wanting peace and quiet beneath the ancient plant that she has all but claimed for herself, despite having not even been conceived when it was planted
  * So, instead, MJ elects to completely ignore them, endure the discomfort for a day, and then enjoy the peace and quiet doubly tomorrow
  * And it’s not so unbearable, really
  * The best friends sit on the other side of the tree, talking quietly and using their wands to skip rock unnaturally far across the Black Lake
  * Still, when they leave shortly before she does, MJ can’t help but look forward to the peace and quiet tomorrow
  * When she arrives the next day, however, the Slytherin makes a discovery that only makes her more desperate
  * Because not only are the boys here again
  * But they are wearing their Muggle clothing
  * It’s not that MJ has anything against Muggles, of course
  * She may be a Slytherin, but her father was a Muggle before he left her mother, and she finds the idea of a simpler world a bit appealing when her brain gets too loud
  * But the thing about Peter Parker’s Muggle clothing is that he likes to wear jeans
  * Now MJ is all for people wearing whatever makes them comfortable
  * But
  * When Peter Parker wears those jeans?
  * Well, let’s just say it’s rather hard not to look
  * For a while, MJ manages to successfully ignore the boys
  * She makes it that day, then the next, then the next, until it is almost six days into a week
  * Their conversations are actually rather interesting, and a few times their talk about homework assignments give her ideas that earn MJ extra points
  * But still, they’re distracting, and still, they’re intruding on her quiet
  * And still, Peter Parker’s posterior refuses to quit
  * It’s on the sixth day into the week that MJ can’t take it anymore
  * As they are debating whether or not the giant squid really exists, they’re sending the stones flying with loud splashes, larger and larger, and the droplets are getting on her parchment even from a few feet away
  * It’s when a particularly large droplet lands on the parchment, smearing her ink that she loses it
  * MJ drops the parchment, pulls herself to her feet, and storms up to the boys who are leaning against the trunk
  * Both of them stare at her for a moment, then Ned offers a nod
  * “Hey, MJ. What’s up?”
  * “Look,” MJ says exasperatedly
  * “I know you guys are new to this spot or whatever, and I know you’re not trying to be obnoxious. But respectfully, if you’re gonna keep throwing stuff while you talk about the squid, please either take a long walk off a short pier to find out, or do it somewhere else.”
  * For a moment the pair are silent, but then the unthinkable happens
  * Peter Parker offers her a sheepish grin
  * “Sorry,” he says, running a hand through his hair
  * “We didn’t realize we were bugging you. We figured you wouldn’t mind a little company.”
  * “Especially since you’ve sat here alone for, like, ever,” Ned points out
  * Okay, that shouldn’t sting, but it does
  * Still, MJ just raises an eyebrow, keeping her face unimpressed
  * Peter, however, shoots Ned a look, and for some reason that little act of compassion both mortifies her and sends her heart racing
  * And then, to make it worse, Parker attempts to distract from his friend’s blunder in a way that causes MJ’s brain to stop functioning entirely for a moment
  * “Point taken, though. I mean, the best way to figure it out is to check ourselves, right?”
  * And then, Peter Parker is standing, and he grips the back of his shirt and jerks it over his head before MJ can even finish saying “What-”
  * After he pulls it off, though, MJ isn’t saying much of anything
  * Because, as her eyes fall upon the muscular, sculpted abs and pecs that Peter Parker apparently hides under his shirt, she realizes that they are, truly, the most magical sight she has ever seen
  * Panic shoots through her, and MJ jerks her gaze away from them, anywhere but Parker’s chest
  * Consequently, she finds herself staring into Peter’s dark brown eyes with shock in her own irises
  * “Wh- Uh, what the hell are you doing?” she manages to force out as she stares at him
  * “Checking for the squid,” Peter says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world, shooting her a goofy grin
  * It’s sweet and it’s playful and it’s gentle, and for a moment MJ could almost forget that this kind deflection of her embarrassment is being initiated by the same kid who looks like he was chiseled from marble
  * “Ned, you gonna come in?”
  * From beside Peter, Ned goes, “Uh, I don’t think-”
  * Peter shoots him a look, though, and Ned lets out a sigh
  * “Okay! Okay, fine, whatever.”
  * It’s Ned’s turn to take off his robes, revealing a pair of khaki shorts and a nerdy t-shirt beneath, clearly a gift from Parker
  * Peter turns to the lake, and then Ned does, too, but by now MJ is coherent enough to be able to protest
  * “As admirable as the commitment is, neither of you is dumb enough to think that I meant it literally,” she points out, running a hand through her curly hair
  * After all, it’s the lake
  * It’s cold and it’s dark and it’s deep, and the edges close to the shore are filled with algae and a liberal amount of plants
  * No one in their right mind would go in there
  * But Peter Parker seems determined to prove to her that he is not, in fact, in possession of a functioning brain
  * So he turns to her, offers her a grin, and says, “What? You wouldn’t say something you didn’t mean, Jones. We’re just taking your advice.”
  * And with that, he begins walking down the short dock that leads onto the lake, meant to be used the few times a year the Gameskeeper has to tend to the creatures of the lake or harvest some of the algae
  * “Parker, you can’t just-”
  * Before she can finish, though, the stupidly sweet asshole has turned his back to her, and MJ is forced to stare at his well-developed lats and glutes before he takes a flying leap off of the dock, followed by a splash
  * Ned walks down the pier, then, too, rather more dejected than his best friend
  * “Leeds, you don’t have to-”
  * Ned turns, and as he looks at her, he offers her a grin that’s somewhere between sheepish and apologetic
  * “Yeah, yeah, I do.”
  * And then, though he doesn’t jump with the same enthusiasm, Ned steps off the pier and lands in the water with a splash
  * By then, Parker has surfaced, and MJ’s eyes find him immediately
  * The sight of Peter with his messy curls plastered to his face and a grin transforming his features, even as he shivers, is a strange one
  * At first, MJ isn’t sure whether she should feel even more embarrassed, but as he opens his eyes and fixes her with a stare, she finds that all thoughts of being uncomfortable fly out of her mind
  * “Yep, I’m pretty sure I saw it down there!” Peter informs her, and the absurdity of it all gets to her then
  * This is doubled by the way that Ned’s hair drips down over his eyes when he bursts through the surface
  * Before she knows it, a grin is twisting MJ’s lips and spreading across her face, and there’s a strange warmth growing in her stomach
  * “You guys,” MJ informs them, shaking her head, “are losers.”
  * “Informed losers, now that we know there’s a squid under there,” Ned corrects her, a smile sliding onto his face through the shivers
  * “But I don’t know,” Peter muses, mischief entering his eyes as he looks at her, “we might need a professional second opinion.”
  * When MJ realizes what he’s implying, the grin slides off her face and her eyes widen
  * “No way,” she informs him, shaking her head vehemently, “are you getting me in there. People are staring!”
  * And it’s true, they are
  * Flash Thompson and the rest of his group of Ravenclaws are sniggering across the grounds, and a group of girls walking past burst into laughter at the sight of the two dweebs in the water
  * One blonde in particular looks extremely amused, and Ned’s eyes light with eagerness when he spots her
  * “Hey, Betty!” he greets, raising a dripping hand
  * The girls laugh with renewed fervor as he cheekily questions, “Want a hug?”
  * The Hufflepuff shakes her head, sending her shoulder-length blonde hair swinging as she hums, “Dry off, then we’ll talk.”
  * MJ gives Peter a pointed look as the girls walk away, and he looks up at her innocently
  * “What? It’s just a little audience. And it’s not like you’re scared… Are you?”
  * The dare isn’t threatening, it’s teasing, and Peter’s eyes dance as he poses the question
  * “Come on, Jones,” Ned prompts, “the water’s nice!”
  * To illustrate his point, Ned sends a few droplets up on the wind with a splash, and when they fall to her cheeks they’re like little shards of ice
  * MJ can’t believe, as she stands there, the way her week has gone
  * She started it content to be stretched out in the grass by herself, willing the stress away for hours at a time with the sun warming her skin
  * But now?
  * The stress that she’s been feeling, somehow, melts away in the face of the absurd proposition of these two idiots
  * And, in the pit of her stomach, she can’t stop the growing warmth that is blossoming there as they both look up at her earnestly
  * So, rather than giving them a firm, “Hell, no,” and returning to her daydreaming, MJ raises an eyebrow in response to their challenge
  * “Please,” she replies, “the only thing I’m scared of is being associated with you two losers. But no one would possibly believe that someone on my level of cool would hang with you, so I think I’m safe.”
  * In response to her deadpan teasing, the other two grin, watching with anticipation to see if she’ll follow through
  * Before MJ can think about what a bad idea this is, she steps up to the dock, and, in one fluid motion, tugs her robes over her head
  * Immediately, the air teases goosebumps up on her arms
  * Beneath her robes, she only ever wears a camisole and leggings, so her shoulders, neck, collarbone, and a good portion of her sternum are bared to the wind
  * MJ takes the opportunity to gather her curly mess of hair into a lumpy ponytail, trying not to notice the way that Parker’s eyes widen and his cheeks flush in a way that contradicts his shivers
  * When she has finished, MJ slips off her shoes and socks and turns to them, warning, “Watch out, dorks.”
  * And with that, she takes one running step, then another, and then she is jumping off the dock and free falling for half a second in the air
  * She hits the water with a boom, and immediately her whole body locks from the cold
  * The sound of the splash thunders through her ears underwater, and a million freezing little bubbles rise to the surface as she sinks into the dark water, liquid that might as well be ice against her skin
  * The breath is forced from her lungs by the freezing water, and for just a moment, MJ is too cold even to think
  * After a few seconds, however, her body begins to rise to the surface, and after an instant of rising her head pierces through the water into the open air
  * For a moment, MJ is too cold to even open her eyes
  * Her feet find the gross, slimy bottom of the lake underfoot, and a few tendrils of freshwater plants caress her thighs in a way that makes her squirm
  * But, after a moment, she finds footing, and then she opens her eyes
  * And the sight she finds staring back at her takes away a little bit of the chill
  * Because both of the soaking wet nerds are beaming at her, and there is awe in their eyes as they look at her
  * MJ’s teeth begin to chatter, and for a moment, Peter appears remorseful
  * He opens his mouth to say something, but before he can, MJ is already speaking
  * “You two are such drama queens. This feels like a freaking hot tub”
  * For a moment, there is quiet
  * Then, the two burst into laughter, and now everyone is looking
  * But, as MJ joins in the laughing after a moment’s hesitation, she finds that no matter how hard she tries, she can’t seem to bring herself to care.




End file.
